One of the most cliché yet effective things I have learnt after being promoted into a management role is “Communication is the key to success”… who would have thought? If the key to a successful business or relationship with another person is determined by communication, then it is pretty obvious that the same theory needs to be applied with the most important relationship you will have in your entire life, the relationship with yourself.
Those conversations you have with yourself, those thoughts that won’t fuck off, those loud voices in your head that yell “YOU CAN’T DO THAT” at things you want to do but are too scared to try. You start to believe every word those voices are speaking because you hear them so often. All of these noises are a clear indication that you need to have “that awkward conversation”.
Like I have mentioned before, I am socially awkward at the best of times and speaking about depression is fucken scary because if you’re anything like me and stubborn you will find it hard to accept that you have depression. And then comes the embarrassment of admitting that you have it and wanting/needing help. Trust me, I get it! Regardless of how you feel, you aren’t going to get out of this state of mind if you don’t move through it and do something about it.
I had no idea how to communicate with myself and with anyone really, so I actually felt sorry for my therapist when she was trying to help… it was like getting blood out of a stone when trying to have that awkward conversation with her.After several sessions with her I finally found a way to communicate with myself and that was through writing, with every negative word, feeling, experience I wrote I felt a sense of relief and freedom.
Your brain is the most important muscle (besides your heart of course) which is why you need to be exercising it and giving it the same amount of attention as we do to our spray tanners who miss our elbows when tanning us, or glaring at the hairdressers who are cutting our hair making sure they don’t cut too much off. Finding that “exercise” can be hard especially when you are in limbo and feeling confused about everything, I get it. I understand that everybody is different, the only person who understands you the most is you! You know what you like doing and what you’re good at, so do it.